


Whomp, There It Is

by haders



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Drinking, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M, Movie: IT Chapter Two (2019), Pining, Pre-Slash, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, gay pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:13:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22156072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haders/pseuds/haders
Summary: “What does she do?” Richie asked, genuinely curious.“Uh, she doesn’t— I mean, she doesn’t work right now,” Eddie stammered, clicking on a photo from their wedding. Richie choked.--Richie asks to see a picture of Eddie's wife the night of the reunion dinner. Then Richie's history of hating Eddie's crushes/girlfriends comes up.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 3
Kudos: 117





	Whomp, There It Is

Richie bounced as he fell against the mattress, legs hanging off the side. They were in Eddie’s room after too many drinks downstairs in the townhouse. Beyond tipsy, but not quite shit-faced, Richie could handle close proximity to Eddie. Seeing him for the first time in nearly 30 years made the feelings come back and hit him like a fucking freight train. He was drowning in it, hence the drinking. Not healthy. He knew that, but he was coping. Also, Bev just told them all she had premonitions of their death, so like— cut him some slack. 

“Just show me a picture, man, I’m not going to make fun of her,” he said with feigned sincerity, taking off his glasses to rub at his eyes. The room felt like it was tilting when he closed his eyes.

“No, no, no,” Eddie paced on the other side of the room as he unpacked his toiletry bag, placing various products on the edge of the sink in the bathroom, leaving the doorway open. “ _Not_ falling for this shit again.”

“C’mon, I’m _serious_ ,” Richie called back, unable to help the smile creeping up on his face. He didn’t remember the last time he smiled this much. His cheeks hurt. 

“No, fuck you,” Eddie retorted, but as he came back into the room for the umpteenth time, he grabbed his phone off the dresser where it was charing and unplugged it. He was thinking about it. He was giving in. As he always did with Richie.

“Honestly, Eds, I’m happy for you,” and he meant it genuinely despite the desperate ache in his chest. “Glad you found someone other than your mom to pour your cereal in the morning.”

“Oh _fuck_ off,” Eddie said, but couldn’t help the laugh. “You really haven’t changed at all, you know that right?”

“Changed a little.”

“Yeah, how so?”

“Well people pay me when I run my mouth now, that’s nice.”

“That’s not _you_ changing, that’s circumstantial—”

“You’re getting this all for free. I should really be charging you.”

“ _Charging me?!”_

“Plus interest for all those years of free material—” Richie stopped mid quip as he heard Eddie’s phone unlock. He sat up on his elbows and caught Eddie’s gaze. “Wait, what was that?” 

“If it will shut you up, I’ll show you the damn picture,” Eddie grunted, walking over to the bed and taking a seat next to Richie. Their shoulders bumped as Richie sat up and peered over as Eddie scrolled through his Facebook page. 

“Of course you have Facebook,” Richie mumbled. Either Eddie didn’t hear him or he just ignored him.

Richie’s head was spinning. He had various pictures in his head of who he thought Eddie were to marry. He even thought about ducking into the bathroom back at the restaurant and looking him up on Facebook himself, but dragging himself away from Eddie after all the feelings started to rush back — no. He chose to stay and try and make Eddie laugh as much as possible. _Focus on me_.

Now with the anticipation building, Richie had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop the nervous verbal vomit from exploding out of him. He felt like he had been obvious enough back at the restaurant — _you got married? what, to like, a woman?_ — but of course, Eddie didn’t change. Still the same oblivious bastard as always.

“Her name is Myra,” Eddie explained, shifting a bit. Was he nervous? Why was he nervous?

“What does she do?” Richie asked, genuinely curious.

“Uh, she doesn’t— I mean, she doesn’t work right now,” Eddie stammered, clicking on a photo from their wedding. Richie choked.

It was Eddie and on his right was his mother, looking the same as when they were kids, just a bit wrinklier. On his left was— _wait._ They looked identical. Richie blinked and took off his glasses, rubbing them on his shirt and pushing them back up the bridge of his nose. He squinted. Nope, they still looked the same.

“What the fuck was _that_ noise?” Eddie was extra defensive. Touchy. _Beep beep._

“Nothing, nothing. Do you, uh, have one of just you two?” Richie tried to keep his tone even. Do _not_ joke right now. _Maybe you’re just really drunk._

“Yeah, probably,” Eddie swiped quickly through the wedding photos. 

“Where did you get—”

“Small church in her home town,” Eddie finished before Richie could even get a question out.

“How’d you meet?” Richie tried to sound sincere, but as Eddie swiped, he grew more horrified for his best friend. She was his mother. He never escaped. He was heartbroken for him. 

“Fuck off, Rich, you don’t really care about this shit,” Eddie closed his phone and got up. “Just say what you’re going to say and let’s move on.” 

“Say? What do you mean?” 

“Gimme your stupid joke and be done with it.”

Richie put a hand over his chest in mock offense and opened his mouth. He had _a lot_ to say, but he was more sad than witty at the moment, so he settled for: “Does she call you Eddy-kins, too?”

“See?! I knew it!” Eddie threw his hands up.

“You asked for it!” Richie argued.

“You haven’t changed _at all!”_

“You literally asked me to—”

“Typical Richie, always has something to say about who I am seeing. Ever since we were fucking kids. Stan knew it too, he told me what you did with Sarah and senior prom. I still can’t fucking believe you.”

Eddie was _furious_. Fists clenched at his sides, huffing like he just ran a 5k, eyes narrowed, lips pursed. Richie fell back on the bed and shook his head back and forth; a smile tugged at his lips. “Not this shit again, I explained myself!” 

“Explained yourself, but you never apologized, dickwad,” Eddie ground out, crossing his arms over his chest. “I mean who fucking pays a girl to not go out with her best friend and calls that a prank? I was crushing on her for over a year and she didn’t have a date to prom.” 

Richie sat up too fast and grunted, gulping down whatever threatened to come up. “Ngh, why do you still care about this shit?”

“Because of this stupid clown magic bringing back all the memories of the shit you did to me,” Eddie laughed incredulously. “And… _and_ I remember Monica. You _hated_ her! Made sure she didn’t talk to me.”

“Ugh, Eds, who would want to go out with someone named _Monica_? I was doing you a solid.”

“And Jen. I don’t even know what you said to her, but she literally _ran_ from me in the hallway. I mean it took _effort_ , Rich. She changed her schedule so we didn’t walk down the same hall anymore,” Eddie’s voice was raised, his hands gesticulating wildly in front of him. _Fuck,_ Richie missed this.

“Man, what’s your point? I’m _sorry._ I was a little shit back then. It’s no use me apologizing for shit 30 years ago, _fuck_. I didn’t say anything mean about your wife,” Richie said, putting his hands up in surrender. Richie was pretty proud of that fact. 

There was a beat and Eddie looked down, shuffling his feet. He crossed his arms and sighed. “You’re right, I—”

“I mean, I _could have said_ ,” uh oh, “damn, Kaspbrak,” here it comes, “did you really marry someone three times your own body mass?” Whomp. There it is.

Richie looked up to see Eddie, mouth open, eyes wide and blinking slow, fists clenched, stance ready for a fight before he bellowed:

“FUCK YOU!”

“FUCK _YOU!”_

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know if you're interested in another chapter to flashback to that time that Richie was a pining gay teen in high school, wanting to go with his bff Eddie to senior prom.


End file.
